I AM not bitter.

(I hope that by the end of this post, I have fully convinced myself. Haha.)

Seriously, I have never been loveless because my heart has always been  filled with love — not for a single person but for the humanity as a whole. Haha.

Whaah! This is such a stupid post.

I didn’t know Erik Erikson’s developmental stages is this serious. Ugh. Intimacy vs Isolation. I hate it.

Here’s my list of tips on How-To-Survive February 14:

• Never listen to Smother Me by The Used.

I’M NOT talking about tenses here nor about girlfriends.

I’ve never had a conversation with an online friend quite a long time. Just this afternoon, we had the chance to chat on Facebook.

Our conversation came to a point that he said he doesn’t have a future anymore. He told me that his parents used to tell him to always think about the future but until now, he said, that future hasn’t come.

Then I told him, “What you are today, was once your future. The future you are thinking of today will soon come. That future will become your present, and eventually, your past.”

PART OF my goals for 2010 is to master a new skill every month. For this month, I’m trying to learn Adobe Illustrator.

To relieve stress, I drew this simple graphic below before going home this afternoon:

I have a bit of obsession with sun rays these days. In fact, after posting this, I’ll drop by the beach to watch the sun as it meets the western sea.

IF YOU watched the news last night, they again showed the usual predictions of Chinese astrologers for 2010. I could remember the astrologer saying that people who are born under the zodiac sign Aries, like me, are warned to be watchful as the coming year is foretold to be quite an unlucky one for us.

I am not really superstitious—spiritual, may be—and I believe that God is communicating to us in various ways but definitely not through horoscopes.

HE SAYS I should be part of Introvoys. No, it is not because I can sing well. Definitely not. It is because when he asks me to sing, I only sing the first few lines of the song and he would always prod me finish it.

My conversations with Ken on the phone does not only keep me sane. They also make me realize some of life’s little lessons.

One recent insight I got from him is about beginnings.

Yeah, I am man of beginnings. I am always enthused with starting new things, trying out something new and something different.

THE PAST month reminded me that time is so precious. Even more precious than gold, if I’m allowed to modify the cliché. Well, I’ve been chasing time and nudging deadlines. Although some things can still be tweaked, other deliverables have already been missed that making up for  what was lost is almost impossible.

The reasons?

• Special tasks. I have been my principal’s favorite when it comes to preparation of urgent reports. Though it’s an addition to my learning experience, it eats up a great portion of my time.

THEY SAY pain and suffering can make one a strong person. But it doesn’t seem to work for me for I have endured a lot of it as a kid and yet, today, I still succumb even to the slightest of pain.

Back in my grade school days, I have always felt that I’m the underdog. I did well in school but nobody seemed to be happy for me. Some people appreciated my abilities but nobody appreciated who I am. I felt unloved, even unwanted.